When you have an annoying breakout on your chin or you've forgotten to touch up your roots, you might think it's all your guy is looking at. Well, relax. "Most men aren't picking up on the things we assume they're staring at," says renowned biological anthropologist Helen Fisher, PhD, author of Why We Love. The reason, she says, has a lot to do with evolution. "In general, men are wired to notice obvious signs that convey interest in mating — a warm smile, for example — and ignore other subtleties, like if your lipstick is faded," she explains. We asked Fisher to illuminate us more on her fascinating research.
He won't notice... If your hairstyle is a little messy.
He will notice... If your hair condition isn't great.
Fisher explains: "Men couldn't care less if your strands are perfectly styled and neat. In fact, he might like you more with some wildness or bedhead, since it shows you're carefree and relaxed. But he will notice if your hair looks or feels very dry, brittle, or damaged, which are signs of poor health. On a subconscious level, men seek out partners who possess healthy physical attributes."
So spend more time lounging with him on Saturday morning and less time flat-ironing in the bathroom. If you have some damaged spots, mist with a healing leave-in spray (like John Frieda Daily Nourishment Leave-In Conditioning Spray, $5.99).
He won't notice... Skin that's shiny.
He will notice... Skin that's inflamed.
Fisher explains: "A little natural oil on your face is nothing to get worked up about. Let it go. The thing you do want to tend to is irritation. When your skin is inflamed or puffy, it indicates stress — it's a physical manifestation of some kind of reaction or allergy."
If you have a lot of redness, get it checked out by a derm. You can also switch to gentler hypoallergenic or mineral makeup.
He won't notice... Minor roots.
He will notice... A major haircut.
Fisher explains: "Men typically pay attention to only big shifts in your overall style — like getting bangs or a short bob. He might be wondering, Her look has changed; does she want me to change in some way too? Having roots, on the other hand, doesn't really mean anything to guys — it's neither positive nor negative, and it has no larger significance to them."
If you have to go a few weeks longer than usual between touch-ups, don't worry. It'll keep your hair healthier in the long run, and you can just wash with a color-protective shampoo to max out your shade for more time.
