Dear Miss Manners,
I am currently running for an elected position in my community. At this stage in the game, people are starting to ask questions about how I feel about my opponent and his background. Because he and I have worked together in the past, I know what a bad leader he is.
I would like to run a campaign devoid of rude comments, but I of course am bombarded with questions from voters and the press. How do I politely express myself towards this other person?
Gentle Reader,
Respectfully. You would be surprised how many candidates have lost by being treated respectfully.
But before you thank Miss Manners for nudging you to throw the election, please allow her to explain a dynamic of which every other politician seems to be unaware. That is that politeness helps, not hinders, in skewering an opponent.
When an opposing candidate calls his rival a cheat and a liar, voters tend to figure that oh, well, they both are, that's just the way politicians talk. If you say what a nice person your opponent is, only unfortunately misguided on certain key issues and stymied when it comes to getting things done, they may actually listen to the rest of what you have to say.
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Dear Miss Manners,
As a frequent traveler for business as well as fun, I get increasingly aggravated of the lack of plane etiquette especially when de-boarding a plane. The fact is that it is the same philosophy one should apply when leaving a movie theater or any sort of group setting where the seating is similar. I understand that oftentimes people are in a rush, but if everyone obeys the rules of "plane disembarkment etiquette", everyone would get where they need to be in a timely manner.
Am I the only one who feels that the art of letting fellow passengers disembark the plane in order of row is the normal thing to do … as sometimes I feel we have lost all form of etiquette.
Please advise how to handle this situation as it sometimes enrages me as I am de-boarding a plane as the lack of respect the common man shows towards their fellow passengers.
Gentle Reader,
The whole set-up would enrage Miss Manners if she did not have such a commendably mild temper. People are darting all over to reclaim items that they stowed wherever there was room, and pleas from the flight attendants to let people with tight connections go first are often unheeded.
She only hopes that you are able to contain your righteous rage to the point of minding your own disembarking manners rather than seeking revenge of those who push ahead.
Send Miss Manners a question
Judith Martin's latest book is No Vulgar Hotel: The Desire and Pursuit of Venice. She is also the author of Miss Manners' Guide to Excruciatingly Correct Behavior (Freshly Updated). She and her husband, a scientist and playwright, live in Washington, D.C. They have two perfect children, of course.
